Springtime, a time for new beginnings

Spring is in the air and it’s time for new beginnings.

What is it about Spring that makes us feel more motivated to do things?

Maybe it’s waking up to the daylight streaming through the window or the growth of new plants and flowers blossoming and the promise of some warm days and balmy nights.

It’s the time for Spring cleaning and clearing out the old and creating space for the new. I spent an afternoon this weekend clearing out my walk in wardrobe, which wasn’t much of a walk in as a push your way in wardrobe. As I had the urge to do it I decided to act straight away as cleaning is not an urge that I get very often. Don’t get me wrong I love the look and feel of a beautiful clean home once it’s done, but I have to say I put off sometimes pulling up my sleeves and getting into it.

So I removed all the clothes and piled them on the bed, there were clothes everywhere and I have to admit when I looked at the pile in front of me I felt like breaking for a cuppa tea, but pushed on through as I was determined to put my money where my mouth was. 

I decided that I needed a strategy as usually this would be my approach:

I would look at each item of clothing and decide a) it had symbolic meaning (ie) I wore it on our first date b) I will eventually fit back into it, once I shed a few more pounds c) it will come in handy when…. and push it back in the wardrobe. Needless to say it would be a pointless exercise. I also have a problem I realised some time ago with endings and letting things go sometimes. I am very symbolic in that inanimate objects can hold value for me and I also like to keep things for “just in case” and of course just in case never comes, so hence push through wardrobe! OK so you get the picture, maybe your closet looks a bit similar or a kitchen cupboard, pantry or work area.

Here’s the thing when you go to look for something you can’t find it and it really is true that an untidy space creates for an untidy mind. So this was my strategy and it worked a treat.

All the clothes I wear regularly and love went back into the wardrobe first and I organised them in outfits, belts and jackets with dresses for work, casual etc.

Then I went back to the pile and threw all the clothes that I hadn’t worn and didn’t really feel very good in into a pile for Sammy’s. If I had to convince myself that I didn’t want them anymore I tried them on and if I didn’t like what I saw it went into the Sammy’s pile and I made myself not look back. Have you ever found yourself going back through the pile again trying to convince yourself that you will wear it someday? The thing to do at this time and what I did was think about the amount of times I have said this to myself and yet still not worn it. Do NOT look back. Actually as an NLP practitioner I know that you are now looking back, so I will rephrase that – LOOK the other way!

Now to the pile of not sures.

Take a few similar items compare them and anything you have put back in the wardrobe. Ask yourself if you were going to pick any of these which one would you choose and you will point to the one in the wardrobe as this is the top that you always prefer. You feel good in it and you receive compliments when you wear it and the one you are holding up now looks like a sack on you and even if you lose a few kilos it will still look like a sack. Be brave and put what you have not automatically picked into the Sammy’s pile.

This is how I went all for a few hours and by the end of it I had four bags of clothes to go to Good Sammy’s and still my wardrobe looked full, but I could now find things and I had found a few things that I had forgotten I had.

The Universe loves a void as it wants to fill it with something new. It can’t do this if we have our space crammed with a lot of stuff that we don’t really want. That’s not to say that we should just go out and fill the space with a whole load of new clothes that we won’t wear, but wait until we see something we really need and love.

Creating space is also good for our wellbeing. Things are more organised, we do not get stressed or waste time looking for things that we know we have but can’t find.

Out with the old, in with the new. It’s a great saying. When we hold onto something for dear life as we are afraid of letting go, we are not allowing better things in. 

As I got to Good Sammy’s with mum to drop off the bags I was tempted to have a quick riffle through just in case, but caught myself, dropped the bags quickly and walked away. 

I felt lighter and I love being able to walk into my walk in wardrobe. It feels so much bigger and the thought of someone getting some use and pleasure out of what I no longer need feels really good.

Spring is the perfect time for Spring cleaning both physically and mentally and it works both ways. When we clear a cluttered space in our physical world not only does it create physical space, but it creates mental space and you know that when you sigh that sigh of satisfaction with a little bit of relief. It feels good to clear out the clutter.

Happy Spring Cleaning!


It’s never too late to have a happy childhood

“It’s never too late to have a happy childhood.” Dr Richard Bandler, co-founder of NLP.

Neuro-linguistic Programming or NLP can be used to assist people to release the negative impact of childhood trauma or memories that are still creating patterns in the present.   We come into the world with an innocence that changes as we experience the world around us and the connections and meaning we give to those events. Something that happened to you as a small child may still have a massive impact on your life today, in fact, you many even feel that it is holding you back from your true potential as your past has such a strong hold on you. You just want to let this go once and for all and go on with your life and enjoy the present.

NLP can be used to go back to past events and bring away a different meaning than the one created at that time. It assists to reframe the situation. It can recreate the memory as a new memory. Each time we remember a memory, the very process of recalling the memory changes that memory, so using this fact we can change that memory for the better. Have you ever experienced a situation when you are recounting past memories with a friend or family member and their recollection is totally different from your own? We all have different filters and frames through which we see the world and each one is different, so every rendition of the same event will be slightly different or completely different.

We focus on what we don’t want, more than what we do. We remember the bad things more than we remember the good things, so we can go back and look for evidence of the good things that were also going on at that time and refocus our energy in these areas rather than on the negative.

From these past events and meanings and connections that we have made in the brain we will re-run these patterns over and over and experience these same feelings throughout our adult life and unbeknown to us each occurrence has added to the same feelings until they accumulate to a breaking point. The event that creates the breaking point may not even be that big but it was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Road rage is a good example of this. Do you really think that the driver of the car is angry about the road conditions or how you, or someone else, is driving or is it part of a bigger issue that that person has carried anger inside them for a long time, which could have started back in childhood and has grown until it has developed to a rage and then one day explodes?

These patterns will continue to repeat until they are interrupted and are replaced with new patterns or behaviours. This is where NLP comes in. NLP techniques give quick results and can be reinforced with life coaching techniques to assist you to identify issues and find new thinking patterns and behaviours that work for you to get you more of what you want in life, not more of what you don’t want.

Are you ready to break the cycle? Do you know someone else who is? If so share this post or take action and see how your life can be transformed with NLP and life coaching.

First Published in LinkedIn : 28 July 2016